(This is a different draft of yesterday’s post, which I wrote before my website went down for a few days. I decided there was merit in publishing this version as well, as it is different enough in wording from yesterday’s, and this is my blog, so what the hey!)
Imagine a world where people were always pleasant to you. Where they were always generous, always kind, always considerate, and always conscientious. Imagine a world where people cared about what you care about, the way you care about it, and for no other reason than that you care about it.
Wouldn’t that be nice?
It’s a nice little fantasy… isn’t it?
It’s only got one or two tiny little problems: if you rely on others to make you feel good, you are constantly giving away your power. Your good mood is constantly at risk of being trampled on. All it takes is one person coming along who isn’t nice, who is indifferent to you or who is short with you, who doesn’t treat you with the respect and admiration you know your deserve.
It takes just one a$$hole to rain on your parade!
The problem is, if you spend any time at all alive, this is going to happen. Again, and again, and again!
When you expect others to make you feel good, you are setting yourself up for disappointment.
What if it didn’t have to be this way?
The truth is, when someone comes along and is indifferent or distracted or even mean or inconsiderate, you have the power to claim your power back. You have the power to say to yourself, ‘You know what? I know who I am. I know my own value. And I know it’s not very realistic for me to expect everyone to cater to me, is it? So I’m going to let them be, I’m going to focus on how I feel about me, and how I want to feel. Because I know I am awesome. I know I am worthwhile. I know that I matter.
“Furthermore, I am going to give them the benefit of the doubt. Maybe we just had a miscommunication. Maybe if I show them consideration and acceptance, maybe next time, they will be nicer. Either way, I feel better when I give up the drama, give up the judgment, give up being right!”
There’s power in claiming unconditionally the ability to create our mood, to direct our focus, to create our own weather so to speak at all times.