Day 9: Focusing on What You Want

(Note: Our Internet was down for three days, so this post is being posted on July 14, 2022, though I wrote it on July 11, the day I consider it “published”)

Sometimes it takes discernment to focus on what you want.

To clarify: sometimes it takes using your best finely-tuned sensing abilities to ensure you are focused on the PRESENCE of what you want and not on its ABSENCE. That can be a subtle distinction and isn’t always immediately obvious.  It can be so easy to imagine that we are thinking about something, when in fact, we are focusing on the LACK of it.

To better understand this process, let’s look at hypothetical examples using two of the most important topics for us humans: money and love. We’ll start with money.

When you think about money, how do you feel? Do you see yourself earning it? Spending it? Investing it? Hopefully watching it grow? If the thought of money makes you feel good, you are probably* in a receiving state of HAVING it and getting more of it. You are visualizing it’s PRESENCE in your life. Congratulations.

If you don’t feel good when you think about money, the opposite may* be true. Do you catch yourself thinking that money is hard to get? Or do you start thinking about how everything is so expensive or how awful the state of the economy is? If so, you may* be pushing money away to some degree with lackful or resistant money-related thoughts. Your mental set point around money will tend to manifest accordingly. 

Okay, now let’s look at love. Does the idea of love make you feel happy, gushy, or overflowing with positive feelings? If so, you are definitely on the receiving side on this topic. You are in a wonderful relationship or will be soon. Perhaps your family life and friendships are thriving. On the other hand, do love songs “make you sick?” Does Valentine’s seems like an exercise in torture? If so, you may be pushing love away. Cynicism may feel better than suffering alone, but it comes at a price of not receiving what you truly want.

When you start to examine your own thinking on subjects and how they feel, you can get a sense for whether you are calibrated to the PRESENCE of what you want in your life or its ABSENCE.  If you are honest with yourself, and you will start to sense which way you have predominately leaned.

It has taken me awhile to get the hang of this matter of discernment. To this day, sometimes I still catch my mind focusing on UNWANTED outcomes in my life (they have a name for this: it’s called worry). I am realizing now how much I focused on the LACK of what I wanted, even when I had no idea I was doing this. Sometimes I thought I was actually helping myself or progressing towards my goals, when in fact I was fighting myself with stressful or resistant thoughts of NOT having what I want!

Yikes. That’s just silly.  And totally unnecessary.

Over time, I am shifting my thinking. Rather than expecting my thought habits to change overnight, I’m going easy on myself and giving my mind time to shift. Meanwhile, I focus continually on the many areas in which I already thrive. This blog helps me focus on these areas. After all, it is My HAPPINESS Obsession! So I write about running, watching movies, reading books, investing, and the Law of Attraction.   This blog gives me a great place to generate happy thoughts of having what I want in life 🙂

I learn what is working by examining these areas that already feel good. How do I chronically think in these areas (hint: it feels positive)? I appreciate all areas in which I already am in the habit of feeling good, yet the more problematic areas are actually a constant source of inspiration and growth. They are a great teacher, encouraging me to press on in my study of the Law of Attraction, to learn more about myself and to refine my thinking so that I can get better and better at receiving what I want.

*I don’t want to be too rigid in my assumptions of how everyone else is. For the purposes of this example, I am using the assumption that how we feel about the topic indicates something about our relationship with that topic, which influences how we experience it in our lives.

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