Sometimes it can be easy to forget that we are the creators of our lives. At the end of the day, you are making the choices for how your experience goes. You get to write the script. In fact, whether you like the script that you have or not, you are the one who wrote the script. It did not come from some else… well, very often it did come from someone else, at least elements of it, the idea or emotion of it, to begin with. Someone else, such as a mother or father, may have first modeled the behavior for you. Yet you are the one who authors it in your own life.
Regardless of how it seems, you are the one who holds the pen in your hand, making the choices to create your life in every moment. You have complete control about the timbre, emotion, look, feel, mood, personality, energy level, joy level, and love level of the experience you have. It is all up to you!
Maybe people have forgotten that they have authored their lives, yet it is no less true. Just because you put your keys on the table in the front room and forgot you did that, does not make it true.
Let’s take a hypothetical example of something who drinks too much. This person wants to quit, but they “just can’t seem to stop.” Yet, did anyone else ever force them to drink? Did anyone ever pry their mouth open and force the beer in? Who is the person who does the drinking? It’s the person themselves. Certainly, there are other factors at work. Yet at the most basic level, the action is taken by that person, and they always have the ability to take a different action if they want it, no matter how much the old action may be engrained in them.
Another example: say someone wants to exercise but “can’t get themselves to do it.” Is there anyone else preventing them from exercising? Even if this person lived with a family that didn’t exercise and actively passed down negative ideas about exercise, it is still the person’s choice not to exercise, or they can change their mind and decide to exercise.
This is not about blame or being at fault if your life isn’t how you want it. Fault implies wrong doing, or being bad or needing to feel guilty to make amends for failing. There is no failure here, no blame, no need for shame or guilt. It is simply a matter of who actually holds the reigns in your life. You do. No one else.
And while this may not instantly solve or change anything, the knowledge that this is true is powerful. You can remind yourself of this, and say, “I know that I am in charge of my life. I create my experience. What can I do here to start creating something that feels good, that is satisfying, that I want?”
Even just asking yourself this question starts to give you some power. It gets you thinking from a place of authorship. You are reminded that you are indeed the one calling the shots.
It can take work to continually have to do this, since for so many of us, it seems easier to slip into the attitude that we are not creating our life. That is incorrect. It is a story, and it doesn’t matter if it’s a story shared by millions of people, it is false.
You are the creator of your life. You are the one who holds the pen. The paper is placed in front of you, and you have the ability to write the script and create the life any way you want it. Notice I say ability. Even someone with ability may not always be willing to use or cultivate that ability to its true potential. They may not know they are able. They may have forgotten. Yet it is no less true.