Today I’m going to take a bit of a break from the “Higher Self” posts to discuss a topic which is no doubt helped along by my Higher Self, lol. That is the topic of having a friendly attitude towards life.
I consider that I have probably become an expert at this, by virtue of the fact that for so long I didn’t have a friendly attitude towards life… or, I imagined that life didn’t have a friendly attitude towards me (which, I have learned, amounts to the same thing). This created all sorts of turbulence in my childhood, as I routinely made assumptions about others that ended with me rejecting them because I assumed that they were rejecting me. I carried around a deep sense of self-disapproval and imagined that other people harbored that same sense of disapproval towards me.
Looking back on it now, it seems rather silly, and quite one-dimensional, to think this way. But I went through all of my teens with these views contributing to a rocky personal experience, and because I never examined what my thoughts were, I had no way of realizing how led astray I was. Miraculously, I finally realized I could not continue this way. Ever since, I have been in a continuous process of self-improvement and self-discovery.
Recently I heard Wayne Dyer say something that has stuck in my mind: that you need to decide whether you think life is a friendly place where things work out favorably for you, or not. To a large extent, this will determine your experience in life.
Think about it. Our attitude is SO important to our experience each day of our lives. When you give off a positive view, a positive expectation that other people around you will be friendly, generous, and kind… wow, it just shows up!
For me, when I was in the midst of my own personal struggle, people mostly were friendly, generous, and kind. However, because of my attitude, I couldn’t enjoy myself with them (the way I do now). So essentially, I was closed off from friendship, generosity, and kindness, even though it was all around me.
I can still recall times I spent my first year in college, for example, longing for even one ounce of enjoyment, while I suffered in my own prison of unhappiness surrounded by other students who all seemed to be enjoying themselves. I was so cut off from my own joy, that I couldn’t experience it around me.
It was only when I stopped to examine the beliefs going on behind my actions, that I really started to understand that I needed to re-train myself, to adopt a new more positive view.
Before I close, here are some notes from My Higher Self on this topic (I did not expect this, but it showed up, so I’m sharing it):
This is an excellent topic, Chris. You are right on about attitude. Your point of focus will create and determine what you experience. When you focus on feeling good, on happy times and good people and things always working out for you, then you will tend to get it. It is law!
One other thing: It can be helpful to remember that you are on this Earth in order to grow and expand. A part of that process is to experience that which is NOT you. The pain, the frustration, the loneliness, these things all contribute to helping you get clear on who you are. This has happened for you, and for many others. You are not alone in this. There is no reason to feel bad or worry about this. It is in fact essential to your growth. If you didn’t have some of the confusion and the mess of getting your hands dirty in this time-space reality, you might not attain the growth and expansion.
Yes, a very good point! Thank you.