Early this year I wrote about my enjoyment of spending time writing at the neighborhood cafe, which I characterized as blissing out. Indeed, that’s how it felt. The experience could be so satisfying that it was truly thrilling. As a result, I essentially became a cafe junkie: at some point in the summer, I was going nearly every day. I have probably gone to the cafe 200 times this year… er, if not that, well, it feels like it!
Eventually, as you can imagine, I started to fatigue from this routine. I experimented with a “cafe fast,” and this helped me find my balance again. Since then, I have averaged probably 3 times a week at the cafe, rather than 6 (!). I also have been paying attention to my experience each time, to try to understand what really works for me and do more of that (and stop doing what wasn’t!).
Today I was reminded of exactly why I love going there. I made sure to pay special attention to what I was experiencing. I showed up there, and I noticed how good I felt, before I had even done any writing. I was just in a great mood: open, receptive, and content. I already was satisfied 🙂
This is significant because recently at times, I would catch myself feeling a certain dissatisfaction while there. I was like I was waiting for the “big insight” to occur, that inspiration or feeling of joy that comes with new insight. There’s nothing wrong with trying to chase after something that is feeling good, but I think I started getting a bit out of balance. I felt more like a junkie looking for that inspiration fix than someone who was aligned in the first place and ready to receive inspiration.
Today, however, was the real deal. I was open, content, and appreciative. I literally “blissed” out for two and a half hours, with no agenda or need, happily writing and having a grand old time. When I came back home, I was elated, and I found myself analyzing the experience to better understand why it was so satisfying.
This experience is exactly why I started coming to the cafe in the first place! I think the difference between today and some of my other recent times is that today I arrived there happy and satisfied. I wasn’t trying to get something, or hoping that being there would fix things.
To me this is a clear example of how inspiration actually works. You don’t seek it outside of yourself (as I was). It’s like that Ghandi saying, “be the change you wish to see in the world.” Or like I heard Wayne Dyer said (to paraphrase): “If you want to be successful, you need to be success. You bring that success with you wherever you go.”
I think I found the missing link! After all, it never really was about going to the cafe 😉 It always was about the person going there. As in everything in life, it starts with who we are being. In this case, it started with me being open to gaining inspiration and wisdom when I was there, and granting myself the satisfaction of doing something I love doing.
I wasn’t hoping to be that way, I wasn’t trying to be that way, but actually being that way!
Students of Alignment, take note!