Tonight I decided I wanted to write about “going unconditional.” This is a concept I learned from Abraham-Hicks and have written about numerous times on here. I find it is useful in the pursuit of personal happiness because, as it turns out, we generally can’t control the conditions in our lives ( Am I right??)
So… what is a happiness-seeking person to do, when all those conditions just won’t behave themselves? When there might at any moment (and probably will) be things going on in our lives that we don’t want, that don’t feel good or that trigger worries or insecurities?
The answer? Go unconditional! In other words, reach for a thought that feels better, one is not attached to current conditions. A while ago I wrote this interesting post in which I examined the fallacy of basing our worth as human beings on our financial worth. This is an excellent example of conditional thinking: if a person’s worth is attached to their wealth, which can fluctuate at any time, they may be in trouble with each market change . But worth and self-worth are not and should not be considered the same! One is unchanging, eternal, unlimited (self-worth). The other probably changes every single day (financial worth).
So applying the remedy in a thought exercise might look something like this:
“I know that I have attached too much of my sense of self worth to my financial worth. Sure, it feels good when times are good! But when times are not so good, this feels awful. It leaves me feeling powerless and unhappy and unsatisfied. How can I gain a sense of my own worth that is not tied to my wealth? How can I gain freedom from defining myself by numbers? I want to love myself no matter what. Aren’t I worthy no matter what? Don’t I have a lot else to offer the world no matter what? Aren’t I a kind person? Don’t I help people in lots of ways. I think I do! I think I have a lot of great qualities and they are not dependent on this one measurement of life experience. Who I am is so much more than that!”
What I hope this conveys is that we can always shift our focus to something that feels better. Generally speaking, it is specific unwanted conditions that trigger unhappiness. And naturally they should… because those are the buggers we just can’t control! But what we can control is our focus. And we can choose to focus on something else, something broader, something UN-conditional.
Conditional: “I don’t have as much money as I think I should have.”
Unconditional: “Who I am is much bigger and more multi-faceted than just my finances. I am an amazing person with a lot to offer the world!”
One line of thinking fosters fear and worry and dissatisfaction. The other line of thinking leads to the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow 🙂 And this is precisely the benefit of such thinking: it leads somewhere good! How much of normal human thought just doesn’t!?
So if you value happiness, go unconditional! You always have the power… if you will use it.